I've kept pretty quiet through most of this contest here on the blog because, as a judge, I wanted to sit back and watch the events unfold. Now that they pretty much have and my judicial duties are finished I want to say this:

There are several contestants saying, "Come on, it's just a GAME. Don't be mad about the way I treated you in this GAME. It was all in the context of the GAME." Yes, it was a game... but the way someone plays a game says something about them as a person. When I play football with my friends it's just a game, but I don't hit too late or too hard. When my coworker plays chess it's just a game, but he doesn't move pieces when his opponent steps away from the table to get a glass of water.

I'm not saying that forming alliances, lying, and backstabbing aren't valid ways of playing. I'm just saying nobody should be surprised when they're called on the carpet for it.

HAHAHA! Mattu you win the Susan/Tammy award for most bitter/angry question. I've been waiting for one of those! :D

I just wanted to write one more thing.

The idea of a merit award is good in itself, afterall they do have Miss Congeniality in Miss America pageants. But the title of Miss Congeniality is definitely not as good as Miss America. I do think she wins scholarship money, but not as much as Miss America. So I think the idea of a Ms/Mr Merit is good, but the prize, in my opinion, should be half the prize of the Mr/Ms DS3, not double. Also all the contestants should be up for it including Ms. Throcky :D The contestants should vote only, not a judge thing at all.

I just want to reiterate that I only speak for myself and that I do talk too much. :) But the more I thought about it, the more it seemed like a good idea just as long as being Mr/Ms Merit isn't better than being Mr/Ms DS3.

Meg, did you see your husband's new commerical for Fairfield Inns?

All right, I should be sleeping - but the craziness of this contest is freaking me out. I'm feeling all insecure and non-worthy, because I cannot double the prize amount. Love you Throcky. And you ARE generous. Why am I feeling outdone though? Sinnamon, your comments hit me and I'm starting to agree. I don't know about two winners. Why did we go through all this then? Sorry, I am drugged and confused and if you pick on my spelling I will stalk you.

There's all this side stuff going on. The "write in vote" - which personally I did NOT agree to. Rather, I said that someone with the most "write in" votes could NOT win the contest. Sure, have a side "opinion poll" - but I do not sanction this and those results do NOT affect the final outcome of the game. Contestants, you can only vote for LadeeLeroy or TvZero, as DS3 winner. They earned their place in the final two, regardless of what anyone may think.

Mass emails and 'hate campaigns' aimed at one of the final two contestants. Don't like it, but hey do whatever you want to make yourselves happy. I told you I can be a bitch. And honestly, I ask that we play the games by MY rules. Only one of the final two can win. I've enjoyed reading each and every contestants' diaries and even had the honor to chat on AIM with quite a few, hopefully making friends (rather than enemies) in the process. So, don't be offended by my post. Nothing personal, I just feel the need to vent.
So, yeah, slap me too. I know many of you feel you can be a better host than me - maybe I'll take you up on that offer. Contestants you've played amazingly. Judges, you've been my therapists and without you there would NOT have been a DS3.

Contestants, judges - respond to this, positive or negative - just get those feelings out. Love ya anyway.

To be perfectly honest and risk slappage:

I really do love Throcky, think she is a wonderful person and writer. And shes a great whore! (Sorry shameless plug! :D) But I honestly think that the idea of a second winner undermines the contest. While I understand why it is happening and can certainly identify with those who have been voted off :D to me having a second prize that is larger than Meg Probst's prize weakens the value of being the real winner.

Frankly the two people left, however conniving or catty or mofo-like they may be, are in fact SURVIVORS. This was not just a contest about who can write, it was also about who can outwit and outplay. Just like real survivor. Having a second winner, in my opinion and this is my opinion only, completely downgrades the real winner of DS3.

When Mike told me months ago that he was planning on having a side vote I could see where he was coming from, but now that there is prize money involved...it's a little too far in my opinion. Again, this is not a contest about who is the best writer. I know previous DSers have also felt that there were other people more deserving of being in the final two, but we all accepted it because those were the rules of the game.

I realize that this is the first DS that has had to deal with an alliance and many of you feel incredibly betrayed and cheated by the alliance, but that is how survivor is played! Believe me, it annoyed me too just as alliances on *real* survivor annoy the crap outta me! :)

I will seriously have to think about casting a vote for Throcky's contest because in all honesty, the person who wins DS3 is the one who deserves it, even if they had to sell their grandmother to do it, that is how the game is played! :)

You may all send me hatemail now.

Throcky's award is very generous and I'd be glad to vote. What a woman our dear Throcky is! I hope everyone does participate. Even if her prize pales mine. Awwww...sorry contestants. For the next version of Diary Survivor, maybe I'll have my act together and be able to provide a larger prize amount.

Thank you Throcky, for gracing our humble little contest and for being so kind.

What do you all think of Throcky's idea?

I'll vote, but I'm not sure it'll make things any calmer around DS3land :)